“Hey, can I buy you a drink?”
99% of men lead with this as their go-to pick up line. Unless you’re T-Pain or trying to be ironic, or both at the same time, it shows you have nothing else to offer her other than a feeble attempt at a conversation. She just won, not you.
I’m not saying don’t buy her a drink at all, but she needs to deserve that free drink. That drink costs an hour’s worth of latte art, make it count.
Chances are the girl already has a drink, in that case, don’t ask to buy her another drink. If she doesn’t have one and you want to talk to her, resist the urge. Chat her up; see if you have a shot before you bust out the plastic.
I’m not saying don’t buy her a drink at all, but she needs to deserve that free drink.
Think of talking to girls at a bar like you’re talking to them in line at the post office or a restaurant (I know it sounds weird but it’s a mindset; change the way you think and you can change the way you act). Keep it simple, unthreatening and like you’re actually interested in what she has to say.
“I see you’re here with a bunch of your girlfriends, what are you celebrating?”
“Oh, we’re not.”
“Oh no? it looks like it, you’re all dressed up looking good tonight, thought there was an occasion.”
If all she’s looking for is a drink, you’ll know in a minute if she starts to slip away into the bar crowd. In that case, she’s not worth it. Keep moving and stick to your guns.
Sometimes girls will actually ask you, “So are you going to buy me a drink?”
And just like I taught you, “Why? Do you think you deserve one? Tell me why I should buy you a drink, sell me on it.”
Of course deliver this with a touch of sarcasm and charm but girls love that stuff. They like to be played with, but don’t be a dick. If you can show some confidence, and a twinge of cockiness, you might be looking at a real conversation…and maybe some chicken and sex.